This is probably the last word you want to hear...

Right now I think it's a bigger cuss word than Mofo or Cocksucker! (when is Deadwood coming back?)

Anyway... the word for the day is I. N. V. E. N. T. O. R. Y. Sends chills down my spine. Makes my eyes roll back in my head. Causes a profound desire to throw things. Big heavy dusty things. Out the window.

Oh, how I dream of a world without 8 Laser Disk Players on the inventory (still!) and only 7 in the AV Closet. Who could possibly have the other one? Why would anyone steal one of those antiques? And Slide Projectors! Why do we still have 5? The only person who ever checks one out is the technophobe art teacher, who thinks she can't teach an art history class without showing slides. Mention words to her like web resources, PowerPoint, and InFocus and her eyes roll back in her head... it's enough of a struggle for her to input her grades on a computer.

Listening Centers that have not seen the light of day for 15 years should be salvaged. So should all the broken down, outdated bits and pieces of technology that have been donated to the library by well meaning souls. Why do we have 2 typewriters?

Oh, and that's another thing... the word "salvage!" All it means is that the district, eventually - usually next year sometime, will come pick up half of the salvage materials and warehouse them. Some day, those warehouses will outnumber the schools! Can't we attempt to sell these items on Ebay, buy new technology if we make any money at all... if they don't sell... ship them out in nice tidy relief packages to 3rd world countries who need any sort of technology. The stuff all still works! Dozens of librarians have slaved for years to make sure they still work.

Not me, nosirreebob, if the bulb burns out on that slide projector, I am not replacing it.

Each day while I walk home from work, I wonder why I am even more exhausted than the day before. Today I thought well... maybe I did more today, but no... it was a pretty normal day. Even a light and breezy day! Then I crunched some numbers in my head and realized that there was no reason for me to be upright and walking. I should be dead. Buried. (No, actually, make that cremated!) And gone.

We all know that numbers don't lie. Numbers are real. Numbers are non-fiction. Numbers revealed the fact that I interface with approximately 140 students a day. Not much? Been around pre-teens and young teens lately? Trust me... that is WAY too many! And those are just the ones in the library on a calm day. The interfacing out in the hall during passing period... well, those numbers are not available to crunch since it would require actually remembering what went on out there in the hall... those things are best left unsaid.

And then, of course, we have the administrators, staff and (shudder) teachers! gah! Who all expect to be helped immediately and before anyone else because...

The're prima donnas? No! They have raised the art of the prima donna to an all new level...

99.5% of them are cocksuckers! (Yes, I watch and adore Deadwood. Get over my potty mouth.)

From Catalog Card Generator

Yo... view the eruditiness of the duda...

The Librarian You scored 60 erudition!

Congratulations! You're well above average when it comes to your knowledge of English grammar, history, and literature. You may have missed a few questions, but if you keep your studies up and stay away from genre fiction, we'll have you ready for Stanford in no time! Who knows, we just might be reading your columns in Talk of the Town a few years from now.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 99% on erudition

Link: The Are You Truly Erudite? Test written by okellelala on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

I just thought yesterday was bad. I had this silly idea that defunct technology was beating my ass into the ground. Oh.... how wrong I was!

Today, I learned the true meaning of many things... including but not limited to:

a. ID printing machines are the devil's spawn.
b. ID printing machines should be ritually burned at the stake.
c. ID printing machines make better door stops than they do an ID printer.
d. Making over 700 IDs in one day with constant stops for broken print ribbons, jammed cards, miss fed cards, etc. is a sure fire way to drive a person to drink!

I'm going to watch Stargate now, and drink a bottle of wine like a drowning fish. Salute!

Yeah... well... I changed my mind!

I tried to convince my co-worker that we needed to tell the principal that we couldn't be in charge of making student IDs for the whole friggin school... she wouldn't listen. I explained how I had seen that scenario go very, very badly in other schools. I even know of one person who quit their job because they could never finish a lesson! They were constantly interrupted by someone who had to have their IDs replaced right NOW. Plus the endless headache of trying to collect the replacement fee from the nasty little mofos who never paid for anything.

But she just wouldn't listen.

So I spent way too much time today fixing broken ribbons and unjamming the card feeder. It had to be constantly turned on and off to reset itself.

The printer is the crappiest piece of technology I have seen in a long, long time. I want to pitch it into the dumpster. But since I've only made it through the R's of 6th grade... 7th and 8th to go... I have to baby it along.

gah!

Oh, and why the hurry? So the little darlings can have them to get into the dance tomorrow night. grrrrr

I deleted all of my blog. Nobody reads it anyway.